


Unworthy of Her

by CutieInk



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Depression, F/M, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route Spoilers, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Spoilers, Fluff and Angst, Guilt, Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-01-16 13:35:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21271892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CutieInk/pseuds/CutieInk
Summary: Lorenz feels unworthy of his place at the side of his former Professor and comrades after battling against them at the Bridge of Myrddin.Although grateful for his second chance, he finds it difficult to overcome the guilt he feels for what could have been if things did not happen the way they did.He now feels the need to do his best to become the man deserving of his professors attention...and maybe more if he's worthy.





	1. Old Mare and Old Comrades

Lorenz mindlessly brushes his horse, Marilyn's, coat as he stares off into the distance, thinking of his former Professor Byleth.

She seems to invade his thoughts on a constant as of lately.How could she not? She never truly left his mind during the five years she'd been missing. She had taught him so much in only that years time and now she has spared his life, five years later at the battle at the Bridge of Myrddin.

That was only a week ago. Today was his first day outside the infirmary, finally deemed well enough by Professor Manuela to be roaming about.

Well, at least physically.

He was ready to die by her hands that day. He felt she was more than justified. Guilt tore at him as he fought her for his Noble duty to the Gloucester house. It wasn't even for his bloody line, it was all for the sake of keeping their ties to the Empress in check.

He never agreed with his father ease to kneeling to Empress Edelgard, but he did understand why. To start confrontation would be foolish with so little chances. But with Byleth and The future King of Faerghus back, there was a glimmer of hope. He only wished that was his first thought as he saw them on the battlefield.

Even as his heart warmed as he saw her striking mint hair and intense gaze, his mind was clouded by his father's words.

_"We insure the safety of our territory at all costs! ...Even if it means doing that mad woman's bidding." His father hisses._

He secretly thought his father a coward, but he felt like even more the coward for listening and never speaking his mind. He could only blame his father so much. He chose to listen to his father, chose to stay, chose to join the fight, and chose to face her...and…

His grip tightens on the brush he holds.

His hand stops its task and he ponders...would he have done it? If she was the one bleeding on the ground, would he have ended her just because of his duty to his Noble status to the Empress? Would he have killed the woman who has done nothing but help him understand his shortcomings and made him a better man just for his families blasted title?

He feels a hot flash of air hit his face, jolting him from his dark questioning. He lets out a yelp in surprise as he looks up to see Marilyn, eyeing him curiously as her ears flicker back and forth. He gives her a shaky but warm smile and pats her muzzle.

"Sorry my dear. Was lost in thought for a moment." He says in a breathy tone as he fixes the stray hair out of his face that was crudely placed by the horse’s hot breath. He continues brushing her but with haste this time, trying not to let his mind wander again.

"Oh! I'm glad to see old Marilyn is alright as well." Lorenz hears a soft voice say making him yelp in surprise, alarming the voice next to him as well. 

Turning he sees a lovely vision of braided blue locks, porcelain skin and wide doe eyes. Marianne.

"Oh! Marianne! How lovely to see you! And yes thank the Goddess she came through! As she always does of course...” Lorenz greets while gently patting Marilyn’s side as he smiles down at his old classmate. “I was not told you were here as well."

"L-lovely to see you as well Lorenz. And yes, most of the Golden Deer’s are here. Well...accept Hilda and Claude." She says in a mellow tone but shakes it off to give a gentle smile. "But I'm glad to see you have joined us."

“You are too kind my dear. And yes, a bit fashionably late but I am here and here to stay!" Lorenz exclaims with as much joy as he can muster.

"That's good…we all would have visited but Manuela said you weren't taking visitors."

Truth be told Lorenz didn't wish to be seen out of fear who he would and wouldn't see visit him. He'd rather not know outright who cared for him even after everything he's done and who could care less he was even alive. "Oh well you know me, can't leave my room without looking as well groomed as Marilyn here. Did you actually think I'd allow any of you the sight of me? Unkempt?! The very idea!" He said with a typical Gloucester laugh. 

"Oh. I suppose that's true now that I think about it." Marianne ponders. "Still we weren't even told you left the infirmary…not even the Professor."

"I do apologize for that Marianne. I didn't wish for this to be a big thing you know? There is much to be done and I did not wish to take eyes away from the tasks at hand just to make me feel needed." Lorenz explains. He was not lying, but he wasn't giving her everything. Thankfully she was not one to push for details.

"I think I understand...she asked about you when you weren't here." Marianne muttered before her eyes widened at her own words.

"Oh, uh...who?" Lorenz asks as he leans closer to Marianne to hear her soft voice clearly.

"...Professor...when she came back to us. We were all here when we heard the news she had returned. She was so happy to see us all. But then she noticed you weren't there…" she paused as she looks down seemingly upset by the memory. "She got all worried and asked where you were...King Dimitri said you weren't coming and she should just forget about you and be ready to...e-end you if she had the chance for betraying the Alliance and Kingdom…" she stutters as she tries to finish.

She hears Lorenz gulp at the bitter truth of how far gone the Prince had become. "She was so angry. I've never seen her that mad before. Never even at you or Sylvain."

He recalls how their Professors gaze hardened at him when he spoke ill of commoners and his duty to his line to marry a perfect noble woman. He finds it hard to look Marianne in the eye as he thinks of how he once wished to polish her like she was some old silver tea pot to make her that type of sterling perfection worthy of his Noble line...it sickened him to think of that boy he used to be. She was lovely the way she was even back then. All the women he evaluated back then had something to offer any family. He saw them as unworthy...how cruel.

He pets Marilyn to calm himself and nervously digs his heels into the ground as he listens to the shy maiden in his presence. Marianne pets her too feeling calmed by her presence as well.

"She told him she'd never hurt you or any of her students…even if she felt like hurting him right then and there."

He can't help but give a light chuckle. "That does sound like our dear Professor."

She smiles at that. "Yeah I suppose you're right…I'm sorry I didn't mean to bring that up it just slipped out. Don't tell the Professor if you could." 

"If that is what you wish, then so be it." Lorenz promised with a simper.

"Thank you Lorenz...well I just wanted to tell you I'm glad you're back safely. I-I...I know it must have been hard to go against your father's wishes. But I'm glad you did. I...I don't know how Professor would have handled...well you know." She trails off, not wanting to say the harsh reality that would have happened if he had declined her offer or if Dimitri got to him first. "We are just really glad you are back."

"That's very kind of you Marianne...although I doubt all of you are pleased to see me here." He says while looking around at fellow former students who pass by with not giving much of a glance or even staring him down for a moment before walking away. He knows he is not to be trusted. Not after what he's done.

"I don't see why that should matter." A tired and stoic voice chimes in.

"Oh! Hello Linhardt." Marianne smiles as she looks up at the young scholar.

"Linhardt? Is that you? My, what a handsome gentleman you've grown into!" Lorenz perks up with his hand over his heart in delighted surprise.

"Yes… five years can do that." Linhardt bluntly states as he eyes the older nobleman up and down. "You've changed as well."

"I...will take that as a compliment?" Lorenz smirks uneasily in question.

"It was. Never understood your choice in...Style. At least when we were students here. But this is different."

"I think he means you look nice Lorenz." Marianne says with a timid smile.

"Yes that's what I meant. Why was that not clear?" Linhardt questions with his brow arched at Marianne. She only looks up at Lorenz to give him a smile, showing her amusement of Linhardt's nature.

"Well, I'm glad to hear my taste has aged as well as I have." Lorenz jests only slightly as he brushes his violet hair dramatically from his face.

"That it has...anyway, forgive me rudely butting into your conversation with Lady Marianne. I had some plans to study with her but overheard the gist of what you two were discussing and thought I'd give my opinion." Linhardt stated.

"Oh, well yes. I mean I have no need to be consoled but it is not undesired my old comrade." Lorenz smiles nervously down at the emerald haired young man.

"If you're worried about others not trusting you, I assure you that you are not alone in that case. Being from the Empire, I've been looked at in suspicion since day one. Which is not only been my reality but everyone from the Empire who has joined our dear Professor. It's understandable mind you, and yours even more so with going against your original Alliance to go to the Empire in order to save your families nobility and then-"

"Uh Linhardt-" Marianne butts in sheepishly with a tug on Linhardt's coat when she notices Lorenz's facade beginning to crumble. 

"Hm? Oh! Right, apologies you must know why, I'm sure. My point is people are bound to talk. But I say let them. It's more fun proving them wrong and showing the Professors instincts to be correct in trusting you."

Lorenz truly didn't expect any help whatsoever from the likes of Linhardt. He remembers him still as the boy who'd sleep through lectures and rudely yawn at almost anyone's attempt to converse with him. Marianne seemed different as well. More brave and expressive. Shy and soft spoken still but she had a glow about her now that showed courage.

It truly amazed him. How they changed. It made him hopeful of himself to get better yet also disappointed him that he had not changed for the good as fast as they had.

"That...is actually wonderful advice Linhardt. I thank you." Lorenz gives a small bow to Linhardt in gratitude.

Linhardt returns it with a brief nod. "You're welcome. Now if it's alright I had wished to steal Lady Marianne away for some crest work. Of course if she'll allow it as well." Linhardt adds quickly as he bows kindly to her.

"Oh yes don't let me invade your plans! If I may ask though, what crest work?" Lorenz asks while tilting his head like a curious pup.

"He's been studying my crest to make sure it's having no ill effects to my environment. Isn't that kind of him?" She beamed as she holds her hands together close to her heart.

"She worries too much but if it settles her nerves I will do it for as long as she wishes." Linhardt says as he looks at her with a fond gaze that makes her blush.

Lorenz's eye bulge at their adoration for one another but gains his composure with a quick clearing of his throat. "O-oh yes that is very kind of you, Linhardt. It's good to see you using you crest knowledge to help my dearest former classmate. Do take care of her, please."

"I will. Good day, Lorenz. Don't overwork yourself; we'll need you soon I'm sure."

"Goodbye Lorenz. It's good to see you and Marilyn again." Marianne brightly says as she pets the lovely mare once more before she takes to Linhardt’s side.

"I will keep that in mind. Thank you both. I hope you two have a pleasant evening!" Lorenz graciously bows to them both before they walk off. He can no longer hear their words but he sees how easily they talk to one another. Something he has rarely seen them do before.

_Because you never got to know them._ He thinks as he sighs and turns back to Marilyn.

"Do I even know you old girl?" He says quietly as she tries to sniff his face which he stops but scratching her cheeks charmingly. "I don't know what that means but I'll take that as a yes...to ease me if you don't mind?" He asks rhetorically as he takes her reins and leads her back to the stables.

As he puts her back in her corral, he notices how worn and torn the stables have become with his and everyone’s absence. The wood was now coarse, drained of color and now and some of the locks were rusted shut. He thinks to take time and tidy up Marilyn’s pen. Something more comfortable and pleasing to the eye like her pen at the Gloucester Estate. A horse as lovely and reliable as her deserved the very best.

Thinking of this leaves him with a smile as the memory of earning Marilyn from his studies of horseback riding.

_"Oh she's absolutely lovely! Thank you Professor! I swear I will use her well!" Lorenz affirms with a bright smile as he looks over the long grey haired mare meticulously. _

_"I'm...glad to hear that. Just remember, she's your responsibility now. And yes that includes doing all things necessary to keep her happy and healthy." Byleth stresses as she smoothes her palm over the mare’s strong neck. Lorenz hears her but does not bother to give her his full attention a he still admires his new steed. _

_"Are there not stable boys who co-" His question is cut off by the touch of his professors gloved hand grasping his chin firmly yet thoughtfully, adjusting his gaze to meet hers. His breath hitches at her boldness but quickly he folds his bushy lips as his eyes fix to hers. _

_"Even if there were it’s not their job to do everything. She's your horse, not theirs. Besides, she won't trust you if you only are around her for battle." She lectures as she picks up some treats and a brush from a wooden bucket near her to hand them off unceremoniously to him. _

_"I...suppose that makes sense." He sighed in defeat as he holds the needed items close to his chest. Brows furrowed as he averts his gaze to not show rosy hue that spreads across his pale cheeks._

_"Good. Now your homework is to bond with her. If you haven't gained her trust by our next battle, you lose her. Simple as that. Understood?"_

"...Yes, Professor."

He sighs heavily at the memory as he locks the decrepit door behind Marilyn and picks up a carrot from the bucket outside it.

"You seem to have forgiven my...youthful improprieties over the years." He says as he gifts the veggie to her which she takes in earnest, giving off a delighted whinny in thanks. "I suppose the treats have been helpful." He chuckles as he watches her enjoy her treat before fixing her bangs. "If only people were so easy." He says that yet knows if it was he'd learn nothing and continue to be only a headache for his dear teacher.

"Goddess, I do hope she can forgive me as well…" he prays as he rests his head on Marilyn’s snout, making her huff sadly at his tone.

He does not expect many to forgive him for his past behavior. He believes he is undeserving of such a blessing. Yet he can hope that just once more, his professor can believe him a better man than he is, and this time truly become that.


	2. Big Lug of a Comrade and Friend

Later that day, Lorenz hesitantly makes his way to the dining hall for supper. Dreading any response or lack thereof the moment he enters the spacious room.

"Come now Lorenz don't be a coward. You can do this." He whispers to himself as he sets his hand on the grand door handle. But before he can attempt to enter, a vast shadow covers the oak door followed by a booming voice.

"Lorenz!? Buddy!"

_Oh Goddess no._ Lorenz thinks as he turns sharply to only be blocked by a burly tall blond with an infectious grin spread across his face. Raphael.

"R-Raphael! Good to-oof!" Lorenz is cut short of breath by his old classmates tight bear like embrace lifting him off his feet like he weighed nothing.

"It's so good to see you!! Whoa! Nice haircut, it suits you!" Raphael commends as he studies his old pals appearance intensely as he still holds him securely to his chest.

"You're too kind." He chokes out. "Could you put me down...before you put me back in the infirmary, please?" Lorenz pleads as he tries and fails to wiggle out of his grasp.

"Oh! Sure!" Raphael plops him down quickly, holding Lorenz’s shoulders so he regains his balance. "Who were you talking to a second ago?"

"Oh! I was talking to...myself." Lorenz shamefully admits as he dusts off his well polished armor.

"Cool! I do that a lot! Probably too much. Anyway where were you man?! I tried to see you at the infirmary today but Manuela said she let you out this morning. Ignatz and I have been waiting all week to see you!" 

Lorenz almost asks why but stops himself. "Oh that's very thoughtful of you two. I just wasn't...um, well ready for much of a reunion. Was still a bit drowsy and I looked absolutely awful! So I went to my room to make myself presentable and then went to the stables to check on old Marilyn." He explains with an uneasy smile.

"Aw I get it! I'm so glad she's ok. Dedue and I made sure she got out of the field in one piece! Dimitri was a bit mad but Dedue calmed him down for me so I could get Marilyn to Manuela for an extra patch up. Man, are we lucky to have him back! You won't believe how scary Dimitri's been." Raphael tries to whisper the last bit while looking around cautiously. Seemingly afraid that any moment said King would pop out of nowhere.

Although Dimtri had not physically harmed anyone under Byleth’s protection, he was harsh with his words and showed an unfamiliar cold essence towards anyone who passed him. It was unnerving for everyone to say the least. He was not the charming yet troubled Prince he once was. But with his right hand man, Dedue, alive and well, ready to fight at his side again; everyone has new hope he can help their dear leader come around.

"You...you saved her?" Lorenz weakly asked not hearing much after he heard him mention Marilyn.

"Of course! I mean Professor healed her first and then asked if anyone could help get her to safety but I offered since I know she means a whole lot to you. You always were spoiling her rotten since the day you got her to stop nipping at you!" Raphael said with a bright smile.

"Yes well, only the best for my Noble steed." Lorenz chuckled and Raphael joins with a hearty laugh. "Raphael...thank you. I'm truly in debt to you. As well as the Professor, Dedue and Manuela it seems. I truly don't know how I could thank you enough…"

Raphael strokes his chin in thought. "Hmm...oh! I know! Let's have lunch together!" he exclaims with his arms extended happily in the air.

"I...is that all? There is nothing you want?"

"What? Too much?" Raphael questioned sadly.

"Huh? No! No lunch is more than acceptable but Raphael you saved my horse, my better half in battle, my protector, and above all my companion! You deserve whatever that big bulbous heart of yours desires!" Lorenz exclaimed while poking Raphael’s wide chest.

"Oh ...well...I can't think of anything." Raphael shrugs.

"Truly?"

Raphael shakes his head with a smile. "Nope! Sorry."

"Well don't apologize! You've done nothing wrong."

"Sorr-oh!" Raphael stops before he finishes the word and pretends to button his mouth closed making Lorenz sigh densely.

"Good...well if you really can't think of anything then please consider this a transaction you may use whenever you'd like."

"I don't know Lorenz...that just doesn’t sit right with me." Raphael says while rubbing the back of his neck uneasily.

"And why is that?"

"You're my friend. I did it because I wanted to help you and make you happy. Did I do that?"

"Well...yes. But-"

"Then we're even!" Raphael declares with his massive hands on his hips.

"No! Raphael, honestly when have I ever been a good friend to you?! Truly think it over!" Lorenz whines.

"Hmm…" Raphael hums in thought which only flusters Lorenz more.

"Exactly! The fact you have to mull it over says it all! If I was a friend as loyal as you have been to everyone, you'd know at least something off the tip of your tongue that would make me at least a decent-"

"Hooold your horses buddy! I'm slow with remembering things and you shoutin ain't helping! Give me a second..."

"But-"

"Shhh!" Raphael spurts as he puts his index finger on his scrawny noble friend’s mouth. Lorenz glares at up at him and pushes his hand away but does quiet himself. Watching impatiently as the big oaf reflects the years they’ve known each other.

Raphael suddenly snaps his fingers with a large gasp. "Aha! Got one!"

"Oh do tell..."

"You taught me better table manners!"

"Oh come now that's nothing special. I mostly did that for my benefit!" Lorenz groans pathetically.

"Maybe so but it was helpful! Linhardt stopped moving away from me during lunch and recently I had dinner with my little sis and she mentioned my chewing was less annoying! I told her it was your doing and she told me to thank you...oh, right! Thanks!" Raphael laughs.

"I...suppose you're welcome. However, I do not think that is enough for you to accept me as your friend.” Lorenz mumbles as he uncomfortable crosses his wiry arms together.

“What about when you’d patch me up if I got hurt and Marianne wasn’t around? You’d always carry that purse thing with you just in case any of us got hurt.” Raphael adds while pointing to Lorenz’s hip where the bag usually laid.

Lorenz visibly blushes as he lets out a frustrated huff. “First of all it’s a pouch; second, with my Noble status it is my duty to take care of the common folk and my classmates.”

“W-well I don’t think I’ve ever met many Noble’s that are as intense about it as you are. You’re one of a kind Lorenz!” Raphael insists.

“That’s kind of you to say…still, if you have felt an obligation to befriend me because of my status or to appease my feelings please don’t feel the need. You are a good man, you deserve a finer friend then-“

“Now you stop right there!” Raphael asserts with a sudden change in tone that startles the noble and a few passersby who adjust their pace to leave the two tall men’s presence with haste.

Lorenz feels a flush of embarrassment at the scene Raphael is starting to cause with his thundering voice. “I-I beg your-“

“Look I might not be all that smart but I ain’t dumb enough to believe you only are nice to me because you think you have to be. You don’t just do it for duty; you do it because you care.”

“And how do you know that?” Lorenz gloomily asks as his folded arms hug himself tighter.

“Well…I’m not sure. But I can feel it.” Raphael says, laying his hand where his big lug of a heart is. Lorenz’s takes notice and his face and grip on sleeves begins to soften at the gesture. “Look Lorenz…I don’t know what’s going on with ya and maybe my opinion doesn’t mean much, but I think you’re a swell guy and I wouldn’t be your friend if I didn’t think so.”

Lorenz can’t help but give off a slow gentle grin at Raphael’s kindness. During his time as a student at Garreg Mach, he quickly realized there was not a bitter bone in his hulking body. That had definitely not seemed to change with age. “On the contrary, your opinion does mean a great deal Raphael. To hear that is…reassuring to say the least.” Shyly admits, melting Raphael’s worried expression into one of glee. “Do forgive my previous notions. My mind has… not been sensible as of late.” He sighs in shame.

“Don’t sweat it. It’s been a rough couple years for everyone right?”

“That it has...” Lorenz replies, guilt seeping back into his thoughts.

“But hey! Things are looking up! With you, Ferdinand and Dedue back, it’s gotta to be a sign we’re gonna win this war!” Raphael says triumphantly as he affectionately yanks Lorenz to his side making him stumble for a moment. Lorenz looks up at him a bit miffed but calms quickly as he sees how sure his friend is of a bright future, a future he sees with him as his true friend. How could he not hope for the same?

He pats Raphael firmly on his strong back and gives him a wide grin to match his. “You do make an excellent point. With our added talents and wit I'm sure we can be of great service to our Professor...and King Dimitri as well of course." Lorenz adds with some reluctance. With Dimitri's current state, it was difficult to see him as a fitting ruler of The Kingdom of Faerghus. Yet he was in no position to oppose. Not if he wished to keep his head.

"That's the spirit!" Raphael laughs as he slaps Lorenz on the back making him yelp from the force. "Oops sorry..."

"It's quite alright." Lorenz chuckles as he regains his prior stance while adjusting his collar. "Well I think I've made a fool of myself enough for today, perhaps I will be a bit less ridiculous on a full stomach."

"Good thinking! Man I'm starving; I hope they aren't out of the meat." Raphael says with a hint of true worry in his tone making Lorenz smile.

"Well then, we should hurry in. Can't have you _wasting _away now can we." Lorenz jests as he opens the door and moves to the side and bows to his comrade. "After you, _buddy_." He says with a wink.

Raphael gives a Joyful chuckle. "Ha, thanks! So chivalrous!" He says as he passes quickly into the building but stops to look back at his old friend who seems suddenly hesitant to follow. "Aren't you coming?"

Lorenz snaps out of his anxiety filled trance and looks up at him."Oh yes, I'll be right in. Just give me a moment, do save me a seat though." Lorenz says with a reassuring grin.

"You got it buddy!" Raphael says happily with a raised thumb before hurrying to the lunch line.

Lorenz chuckles at his haste before eyeing the room. He sees Ignatz sketching quietly with a content smile while Bernadetta marvels at his work as she picks at her dish. His smile widens, happy to see Ignatz has not lost his passion for the Arts. Feeling eagerness to see how far he's come these past 5 long years.

Not too far from Ignatz, he sees Marianne sitting with Linhardt who reads a book allowed to her while Caspar who seems disinterested, stuffs his face quickly with food. Marianne glances up for a moment and see’s her violet haired friend and gives him a sweet smile and a small wave. Lorenz awkwardly smiles back and returns the coy gesture with his own.

Seeing these familiar faces eases his worries yet still finds hesitation to take his first step into the hall. He is unsure of what would be appropriate to do in this dilemma that he has created.

_Perhaps if you had just allowed visiting hours you wouldn’t be in this predica-_

“Hey! Lorenz! You want me to grab you a plate!?” Raphael yells from across the room, grabbing the entire room’s attention from his bellowing voice and then quickly to the purple adorned Nobleman who awkwardly stands in the entrance of hall.

Lorenz’s eyes widen with panic at the sight the many turned heads to him before giving Raphael an unpleasant glare. “T-that would be lovely, _thank you_!” He manages to answer as he grits his teeth in embarrassment. Turning his gaze back to his new audience, he gives a nervous chuckle and a charming smile.

_Well I suppose being thrown to the lions is better than walking into their den voluntarily... _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raphael was very fun to write. lol  
Hope you are enjoying so far!


	3. A Golden Deer Reunion

“Good day everyone…” Lorenz says uneasily with a nod.  
Most seem to go about their business while others whisper to each other quietly as they make subtle glances back at the young Noble.  
But not everyone reacted with such indifference.  
Ignatz’s gaze finally averts from his task as he hears the familiar inflated elegant tone of his old classmate. “L-Lorenz!” He happily says as he quickly stumbles out of his seat, causing Bernie to screech in surprise at his urgency.  
When he reaches Lorenz, he is unsure of what would be the appropriate way to greet him. His arms are hesitant at his side before he raises one out towards Lorenz. “Um, welcome back…”  
Lorenz glances at his outreached hand and then back to the artist’s timid gaze. Although appreciative of his polite gesture, something in him says there is no need for such respectability. So, he takes a hold of Ignatz’s forearm and pulls him into a firm hug. Ignatz lets out a gasp in surprise but eases into the embrace with a chuckle.  
They pat each other’s backs before pulling away. “It is so wonderful to see you again Ignatz.” Lorenz says as he smiles warmly down at his old friend.  
“It’s great to see you too Lorenz.” Ignatz says with a smile as he readjusts his round spectacles. “I’m glad to see you up and about. How are you feeling?”  
“Oh I’m quite well now, thank you. What of you? How is your-“  
“Lorenz!”  
Before Lorenz can even see who screeched his name, he feels pain shoot up his leg leaving him doubled over in pain as he holds his bruising shin.  
“L-Lysithea! What are you-“  
“Quiet, Ignatz!” The small, snowy haired mage hushes loudly, spooking the young artist before turning her attention back to her prey. “You imbecile! You’ve been here for a week, wouldn’t allow any of us to come see you, and think you can just casually stroll into here like it’s no big deal!?”  
“It was not my most brilliant move I will admit…“ Lorenz weakly responds as he rubs his leg before standing straight to look apologetically down at the young lady. “And it’s good to see you too, Lysithea.” He knew her crassness was just out of her passionate nature. She was kind hearted yet had a tendency to lose her temper in times of stress or if she was provoked. Something Claude, their class leader oh so loved to do. Lorenz himself never meant to frustrate her, but his tendency to baby her had caused many tiffs in the past.  
“Hmph! obviously not…” Lysithea huffed as she crossed her arms in disappointment.  
“Don’t mind her Lorenz. She just missed ya.” Leonie, their fellow classmate teases as she reaches them. She gives Lorenz a bright smile that he gladly returns with his own.  
“I-I did not!” Lysithea stammers up at her red haired friend.  
“Well that’s quite a shame, since I missed you.” Lorenz happily teases with a weary smile, making her visibly blush. “In fact, I dare say… I’ve truly missed you all.”  
“I-I think we can all say we feel the same Lorenz.” Ignatz shyly admits.  
“I’ll admit, the Golden Deer’s just aren’t the same without you.” Leonie smirks with her arms crossed. “Right, Lysithea?”  
“Well of course. There was only one person who could ever annoy me more…” Lysithea sighs as she looks down solemnly.  
Lorenz’s face also falls as he is reminded of who she speaks of. “Ah, Claude…”  
Everyone’s mood begins to dim at the thought of their old leader. They all had left the Alliance to aid their dear professor in this war. A promise they would not break. None regretted that decision, yet they fear the repercussions of such. Both Claude and Hilda now could face the wrath of the tormented King they now followed.  
Raphael breaks the mood as he strolls happily towards his classmates with two bountiful plates in hand. “Hey Lorenz! Got your faaav- uhh…what’d I miss?”  
“Ah-oh nothing Raphael! Just reminiscing. Is that mine?” Lorenz asks as he points the plate arranged with sautéed fish.  
“Oh! Yeah here you go buddy!”  
“Thank you my friend.” Lorenz takes the plate coyly before setting his gaze back to the others. “W-well it was lovely seeing you all again. I promised Raphael I’d share a meal with him so I will be going…although I am sure neither of us would mind if you all joined. I would love to speak of these long years we’ve had away from one another… but I understand if you are all too busy at the moment.”  
“You’re kidding right? Lorenz, we’ve been waiting up for you all week. You are not getting away from us right now without a fight. Well, figuratively at least.” Leonie chuckles.  
“Yes we’d love to know how you’ve been!” Ignatz adds with an elated grin.  
“I do agree. Besides…we may not have a lot of time to talk in the future.” Lysithea says with a sad smile.  
“Aw come on Lysithea don’t talk like that! We got plenty of time! But I do agree that now is a great time to talk!” Raphael replies. “I think we’re all eager to hear what you’ve been up too all this time Lorenz.”  
“If…that is truly what you all wish?” They all smile cheerfully up at him as their answer. “Alright then. But do not think I will be the only one interrogated today! I wish to know of all your escapades as well!” Lorenz boldly states with a dashing smile.  
“Alright! Come on guys, let’s go to the old table we use to feast at!” Leonie exclaimed.  
As they all sat together for the first time in 5 years, it began to feel like no time had passed since their last meal they all shared together.  
With how easily they all conversed with Lorenz and each other, a stranger could not be able to tell that the time they spent together had ever waned.  
And yet it was different. They were all different. Some more subtly than others but all could tell that Lorenz was not the same man he was back in their Academy days.  
They of course teased him over his past self. Recalling moments that irked them about the nobleman. Lorenz did his best to not take it too personally. Doing his best to laugh along with them.  
If he was to be put out by anyone, it was with himself and not his dear classmates.  
Even as they poked fun at him, they did it to everyone. From how cheap Leonie still was, to Ignatz's apologeticness which he naturally apologized for.  
It seemed like the only one who was safe from playful scrutiny was dear Marianne who now joined them with Linhardt quietly at her side and his dearest friend Caspar happily joining in on the fun.  
Caspar even complimented Lorenz's tenchinqes on the battlefield despite his utter loss to their dear Professor. Which Lorenz albeit thrown off, accepted the peaceful gesture of words.  
As they caught up to the present, Lorenz was surprise to see other former students come up and offered their short but sweet welcomings him.  
Including Ashe, Constance, Dorothea, even Bernadetta for a very brief moment.  
Mercedes and Annette even came up with fresh baked cookies in hand for their old classmate. Lorenz was taken back by such a gesture.  
He rarely ever spoke to Annette and the way he had conversed with Mercedes in the past was...a bit awkward. Yet here they smiled at him with an open invitation for a proper friendship. He'd be a fool not to take it, he realized.  
So he did.  
Lorenz offered for the mages to join him and his table of comrades and friends in eating these delightful treats they had prepared. To which they accepted happily.  
As Lorenz looked around the table, he wonders why he held this off as long as he could. Perhaps he should have known he had little to worry over. At the very least when it came to his classmates from The Golden Deer.  
He feels unworthy of their kindness...but he wishes to one day be. And as he looks upon their smiling faces, he feels like he's on his way towards being so.  
Though just as his chest feels lighter than it has in years, it is easily gutted with the sound of the dining rooms doors being thrown open as if a storm had suddenly hit Garreg Mach.  
Everyone's eyes bolt to the doors and not a sound is peeped as they see what has caused this sudden outburst.  
It was King Dimitri.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for taking forever with this! Hoping to get back into the groove of doing this more often.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a lot of ideas for this boy so I'm going to try to make this a mini series. I'll do my best to get chapters out at the good pace.  
Added tags and possible implied relationships will be added with time.


End file.
